Female sexual pleasure: why women think sex is for them.

 

The clitoris wasn’t scientifically recognized in similar quality to that of the penis until 1998. THAT WAS 16 YEARS AGO.

If you’re wondering what a clitoris is, and you’re a girl… well you have one. Although the anatomy of the clitoris appeared in scientific journals in the 1800’s, it was never given the same attention as a penis. We know so much about the penis, but not nearly as much about the clitoris- when the clitoris and the penis essentially serve the same purpose in males and females.

Women know what a penis is.

We learn about it extensively in sex ed classes, and we are tested on it in our high school health education system. Pornography is centered around the penis, blow jobs are normal. Somewhere between all of these subtle subconscious lessons on pleasuring the man (this is sarcasm), a women’s pleasure is forgotten. In 5th grade, girls are only taught they they have a period- NOT that they too have a form of the male penis.

Why is this relevant to me?

Today, there is a dichotomy, a double bind, we’ll say, for women. Women, especially teen girls, are expected to be extremely sexually experienced, but a virgin. In fact, the female body itself represents sexuality, and sells sex.

We are expected to know how the penis works, and what we can do to it so that the man is pleased and sexually pleasured. Girls are giving blow jobs to boys before their clothes are even taken off. Women know how to pleasure the man. We are taught from a very young age that the man needs to be pleasured.

But when did we learn how to be pleased ourselves?

How come girls are never taught what a clitoris is when they learn what a penis is?

 

Also, you have one, so it’s pretty relevant. Where it is:

 

MRI-of-Clitoris-converted-to-3D-model

 

Some women orgasm simply from vaginal pleasure during intercourse.

Yes, this is a real thing. Not a common thing, but it is real. Because the clitoris (the major female sexual organ, mind you) has become taboo, many men AND WOMEN do not know that it even exists. How can this be? Well, maybe because women aren’t really receiving any pleasure during sexual acts. Little does the man know… you’re faking orgasms! How asinine!

Males receive much more attention in the sheets than women. Porn is for men. Even porn for “women” is for men. Advertisements use women to get man’s attention. Sex and sexuality is completely centered around men.

Why do women think sex is for them too?

Magazines like Cosmo, advertisements directed towards women, movies, music- all of these things glorify sex and women as sexual objects, and make women seem awesome and all powerful, which I appreciate. But the fact of the matter is, women still aren’t receiving equal pleasure, much like the pay gap I suppose. Movie scenes where women are pleasured are still completely absent. Sex education isn’t teaching young girls about their bodies wholly. Women aren’t talking about how their date went down on them, they are giving their girlfriends  the gory details of the latest blow job they have given.

News flash: SEX CAN BE FOR WOMEN TOO!

Sooo, what do we do about this? We talk about it.

Tell your girlfriends, tell your mom. Make your next one night stand recognize that you need to be pleased too. Tell him he can make a scientific discovery unlike any other! Forget the ribbed condoms, make him cliterate!

If you haven’t heard about CLITERACY yet, you probably should check it out. Watch this video and your respect for this issue will increase some more:

 

How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days.

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In this romantic comedy, Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are both involved in bets proving that they can either dump a guy, or make a girl fall in love by the end of 10 days. Andie Anderson, played by Hudson, wants to make all the “classic” mistakes to force Benjamin Barry, McConaughey, to run for the hills. Let’s pause to reflect on this cliché concept.

First of all, props to Hudson for pulling off that dress without a bra on, a feat that I would never think to take a crack at. Yeah, she nips and we all notice it, but damn does she look… unrealistic? I also want to reprimand her for allowing herself to further define the trite and stereotypical woman- an image that is created by gender, and reiterated over and over again in common media and pop culture. To lose Benjamin Barry in 10 days, she commits all of the “normal” mistakes that all women make with men.

Hah, yeah right.

What does she do to scare McConaughey away? I made a bullet list, my favorite:

  • Calls his mother without him knowing for baby photos
  • Names his penis Princess Sofia (he wanted it to be called Butch or Spike)
  • Coerces him into seeing a chick flick
  • Attends couples therapy
  • Tricks him into attending a Celine Dion concert
  • Replaces the guys’ poker night food with cucumber sandwiches
  • Wants to take it slow on their first date together
  • Calls him at work and talks like a baby about making plans for that night
  • Purchases a love fern for their relationship
  • Integrates pink items and tampons into his living space
  • Buys a freaky looking dog for them to share
  • Photo morphs their faces together to predict future babies

The list goes on just a bit further, but disregarding the attempt at taking things slow, that list of “common” womanly mistakes RARELY HAPPENS. When was the last time you named your partner’s genitals Princess Sofia? I mean, I’ve named them other things, but…

I often lose a guy in 10 days too! Mostly because I do not act like a “normal” woman.

Here are some things you can do to ensure that you too lose a guy in 10 days:

*DISCLAIMER: THIS MIGHT ACTUALLY FILTER DOUCHENOZZELS OUT OF YOUR DATING LIFE*

  1. Pay for your own meal on the first date
  2. Providing your own transportation to/from dates for the first 5
  3. Dress comfortably and conservatively on the first date
  4. Refuse to hangout alone at his place after 9pm
  5. Insist that he meet your guy friends
  6. Discourage public butt grabbing of your butt
  7. Expecting a first kiss, and just a first kiss until next time
  8. Asking to keep your clothes on while watching a movie or snuggling
  9. Discuss your career goals, which puts a career first and a family (or him) after
  10. Mention that you are a feminist

If you do all of those things, even though it’s not an exhaustive list, you will surely lose a guy in 10 days.

Always remember, be classy, sassy, and a bit smart assy.

Precious Jones